DRUGS?DRUGS!DRUGS?DRUGS!DRUGS?DR

PSYCHEDELICS AND MIND-EXPANSION

An essay on the intelligent use of psychedelic chemicals.

By Max T. O’Connor

To be looking everywhere for miracles is to me a sure sign of ignorance that everything is miraculous. Abraham Maslow.

1. INTRODUCTION

You and I have sovereignty over our minds. We control ourselves and we have the right to make decisions about the use of our minds and how we choose to affect them. The government thinks that it has the right to control us, to tell us what we can do, to regulate the substances we ingest. It has made the production, sale, and use of psychedelic chemicals illegal. In doing this it is claiming that it owns us, that it has dominion over our very essence, our minds. As an extropian valuing independence of thought, experimentation and the pursuit of self-knowledge and self-improvement, I reject these absurd claims of the government. Regardless of the law, I do and will continue to experiment with these chemicals. In this article I want to explain to other extropians why they may be interested in exploring the use of these substances for the purposes of self-change in a positive direction. I will primarily be talking about LSD, since that is the chemical with which I am most familiar and which has the full range of effects. Marijuana can have some of the desired effects but is generally weaker and narrower in its effects.

2. SELF-PROGRAMMING POSSIBILITIES

Psychedelics, intelligently used, can be a powerful aid to metaprogramming oneself. What does this mean and why is it important? Our minds run according to a set of programs; these programs are the

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mental sets that constitute what we believe, how we conceive of ourselves and the rest of reality, and which cause us to behave in our characteristic ways. Some of these programs, such as our sexual and eating programs, are wired into us by genetic design and cannot easily be fundamentally altered. Others have been passively absorbed from other people, from parents, friends, the surrounding culture or sub-culture, religions, philosophies and traditions. Some of our programs are carefully and consciously chosen by us. The vast majority of people spend almost all of their time following programs which are genetically hard-wired in them or which they have passively absorbed.

Metaprogramming is the process of discovering what programs control one’s behavior, selecting the wanted from the unwanted, then making those changes and instituting new programs which fit one’s purposes. Metaprogramming is therefore a means of gaining control of yourself, of rationally altering yourself to become more like the person you ideally want to be. Clearly this is not something that can be done all at once, not only because it’s a slow process but because new ways of improving oneself will suggest themselves as you make progress.

Metaprogramming is what distinguishes humans from other species. The essence of our humanity, our personhood, is our capacity to free ourselves from the externally imposed programs which limit us and prevent from fulfilling our capacities and living truly rewarding lives. Those of us who are intensely interested in changing ourselves to be able to more effectively live the way we want are always looking out for new ways of making metaprogramming easier. Once a program is in place, no matter how frustrating or harmful it is, it’s often tremendously hard to change it and so it’s important to look for tools which aid the process. Self-help books contain many of these tools, especially those which help one to identify the thinking that is self-limiting and irrational. Visualization exercises, meditation, introspection, behavioral modification techniques, and other approaches are fruitful - yet the task of self-change is still a hard one. I will leave the job of discussing these techniques until another time and will for now concentrate on the possibilities offered by psychedelic chemicals.

Psychedelic drugs such as LSD seem to have powerful metaprogramming possibilities. These have already been explored by pioneers such as Timothy Leary and John Lilly (see Lilly’s Programming and Metaprogramming in the Human Biocomputer). Much research remains to be done in working out new and more effective applications and in combining it with other techniques apart from the chemical. (I hope that readers of this article are interested in pursuing this research project with me. Reports of your own experiences and suggestions for new uses and techniques are very welcome. Let me know if you wish a pseudonym to be used in any publication of such materials.) There is some direct evidence for LSD’s metaprogramming enhancement effects resulting from Leary’s experiments with prisoners (before his expulsion as a psychologist at Harvard), which resulted in a hugely reduced recidivism rate, and impressive effects on alcoholics who stopped drinking after a single intense psychedelic experience. There are no well-controlled studies to validate

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these reports, partly due to the inherent difficulty of running double-blind trials in these cases, and partly because such research cannot now be legally carried out. The State has decided that we are not to experiment with our minds. The State likes to believe that it owns us and can tell us what to do with our most essential element - our minds. Regardless of such attempted tyranny over intelligence some of us will continue to experiment and learn.

Psychedelics aid in metaprogramming because they increase awareness of normally unnoticed programs, make changes in perspective natural, and lower barriers to psychological and emotional openness. LSD can increase your awareness of thought processes which would normally be invisible to you. Our minds are not unitary simple entities, but are complex coordinated collections of various cognitive processes (see Marvin Minsky’s The Society of Mind). What we experience as consciousness is just that part of ourselves that oversees what the mind/brain as a whole is doing. Much of this remains below awareness (most of the time such a flood of information would be undesirably distracting), but LSD can bring more of this to the surface and allow rational analysis of those thought processes. Particularly valuable is the emergence into conscious awareness of cognitive processes which lead to emotional responses. The chemical can aid in investigations of the causes of one’s feelings and facilitate modification of those processes.

Apart from increasing awareness of normally sub-conscious processes, psychedelics can break through psychological barriers that one has constructed to cover up thoughts, desires, wishes, or experiences which one found, usually due to irrational thinking, to be painful. Not everyone will find this happening to them - it is only a possibility if you have repressed and buried mental constructs which you have refused to face. I discuss the preparations that should be made in the face of this possibility in the next section.

The weakening of psychological barriers is complemented by shifts in perspective when thinking about any subject, internal or external. This is a fascinating and exciting effect of the chemical. It promotes self-understanding by suggesting new ways of seeing one’s thinking, personality, way of living, and situation in one’s cultural and social environment. It is common to see other people in unusual and more insightful ways. I have found that I see people more as they really are than when I am ‘normal’. For instance, instead of seeing the person delivering the mail just as a part of the mail delivery system and treating them accordingly (politely but rather impersonally), I see them as an individual of potential worth, interest, and value. From this enlarged perspective I then act in a very much more friendly and personal manner. I’ve found this to happen all the time, when I’m shopping while tripping, or just when I talk to people I don’t know. It is very satisfying when, with practice and effort, I am increasingly able to carry over this improvement in my character to my normal state. The drugs effect in breaking down barriers and promoting feelings of affection, friendliness, and benevolence make me feel more like I believe I truly am. Max O’Connor really is this outgoing always-friendly, understanding and helpful guy; it’s just that sometimes irrational thoughts and fears stop me from expressing my true self. Psychedelics have a great deal of value in the process of self-actualization.

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3. WHO SHOULD USE IT AND HOW?

I will not presume to tell anyone that they should not use LSD, though I will indicate some dangers that exist for certain types of people. There are precautions that it is sensible for anyone to take, but individuals with particular problems should be especially aware of the risks. As I mentioned above, psychedelics can tear down barriers that you have unconsciously constructed in order to evade facing something about yourself. Suddenly experiencing these things can be an emotional storm, and may be a risk you don’t want to take. Certainly there are risks for such people (and are you sure you’re not one of them?!), but bringing repressed thoughts up to the surface is the only way to deal with them and to finally mend one’s damaged and constrained self. It is up to each individual to decide whether they face any significant risk of this happening, and if they do, whether they consider the potential benefits to outweigh the risks. My personal feeling is that, with the proper preparations, it is a rational choice to try psychedelics as therapeutic tools if there are only a small number of potential trouble areas. For persons with multiple and severe personality problems I would suggest a course of psychotherapy and self-analysis to strengthen the self before considering the use of these powerful chemical aids. If you are not sure whether you have potentially severe repressions, it would be sensible to use only a small dose for the first few experiments.

As has long been recognized by users of psychedelics, set and setting are very important in determining your experiences, especially for the novice. ‘Set’ refers to the mental set with which one approaches the psychedelic experience. If you look forward to it with excitement and with positive expectations you are unlikely to have difficulties. If you are full of fears, then these may become magnified and lead to a bad trip. To induce the proper set for your early trips you should think about the exciting and valuable possibilities there are to look forward to. Listening to uplifting music and relaxing prior to ingestion of the chemical is also helpful. If you should start having paranoid or fearful thoughts, don’t let yourself believe that the rest of the trip must go the same way. It is possible to control the direction of your thoughts and to steer away from anything that disturbs you. Think about this beforehand so that should unpleasant thoughts occur to you, you will be prepared to take charge of your mind and focus on something positive.

‘Setting’ refers to the environment in which you trip. I very strongly recommend that, at least for your early trips (and preferably always), have one or two people with you - people you know and trust and like. They can help you to focus and enjoy the experience. Your companions should understand what is going on, what might happen, and should be understanding and interested in what you are doing. Being with a tripper certainly need not be a chore - they tend to be a lot of fun and usually still engage in normal activities that interest the companions. Select music that you like (try abstract and complex pieces) and have attractive things to look at. Being outside at the beach or in the hills, for anywhere that is beautiful is

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always tremendously uplifting.

It’s sensible to have tranquilizers at hand, at least until the effects are wearing off, just in case you have some problem and require something to calm you down. An anti-anxiety drug such as Ativan would also be a useful back-up, though probably you will never need these (I haven’t in 35 trips with dosages from very small to very large). Apparently a large dose of vitamin B3 can be calming (take it with C), although this will be less effective than tranquilizers. When the effects have largely worn off you may want to take a warm bath or have someone give you a massage to relax you after the intensity of the experience. By taking the drug in the morning or early afternoon you should avoid problems getting to sleep. Ingestion of a gram or two or the amino-acid tryptophan increases levels of the neurotransmitter serotonin (which are temporarily reduced by LSD) and so helps calm mental activity and makes sleep come more easily.

It’s difficult to say much of use about dosage since because the government forces us to buy these chemicals on a black market we don’t know quite what we are getting. In the ’70s it was quite common to find LSD cut with amphetamine (which increases the level of mental activity) but this seems very uncommon now. One tab of the drug may not be powerful enough - in my own experience one tab of the green gel form is enough to get virtually the full range of effects, but I need two and a half of the paper form to get the same results. Try one tab of whatever you can get first and then increase the amount if insufficient. You will know that you have received a good-sized dose if you get the visual effects such as tracers and shifting of textured patterns.

I will not say much about health effects of LSD or other psychedelics in this article. I will note a few points however. LSD is the least toxic of the psychedelics partly because it comes in a pure form. Mushrooms can cause nausea because of other things to be found in them. XTC may have some deleterious effects on the brain over a long period of usage, though the evidence is not clear and, if the research is similar to other government-sponsored work, it is probably worthless. LSD itself is extremely non-toxic. You cannot possibly overdose on it - to do so would require more than you could ever afford to buy! According to Albert Hofmann, the Swiss chemist who synthesized it, LSD has never poisoned anyone, and from his figures it seems that you would need to drink pints of the chemical to harm yourself, whereas the effective dose is around 250 micrograms. It is not true that LSD damages chromosomes. As Hofmann says: ‘…comprehensive investigations of a large, statistically significant number of cases…showed that there was no connection between chromosome abnormalities and LSD medication.’ (Albert Hofmann, LSD: My Problem Child, p.26.) It is also untrue that it produces fetal deformities. (The incredible lies and distortions put out about drugs by the government deserves an article in itself.)

4. WHAT IT FEELS LIKE

Describing the LSD experience is impossible for me. It may not always

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be impossible since we may one day develop the conceptual structure to put those experiences in words. All I can do here is to hint at some of the phenomenological effects of the drug (‘what it ‘feels’ like), but this will not give you much of an idea. I will try to link some of the effects to experiences which many people may have had without psychedelic chemicals. With this information though, and that available from reading the many accounts available in various books (see Bibliography), you will feel a little more at home when you first trip.

The effects start to be felt 15-45 minutes after ingestion, depending on size of dose, individual biochemistry, and contents of stomach (the last I suspect to be true based on my own limited experience - but I don’t claim scientific backing for this factor). The power of the effects will peak after about three hours, will be greatly weakened after eight hours, and virtually unnoticeable after twelve hours. I still find that the initial hour of effects excite me and sometimes lead to my feeling a little apprehensive (if it’s a high dose). After a while I get used to the effects, even though they’re still increasing in force, and lose any apprehension. This initial ‘acceleration’ (as I think of it) usually leaves me and others I’ve observed with little desire to move around or do anything very active. This wears off soon and then a desire for activity will return, interspersed with periods of stillness due to intense thinking.

One of the widely recognized visual effects of LSD is the ‘tracer’ phenomenon. This is the result of the brain retaining after-images and displaying them to the ‘self’ (which I won’t try to define in this article!) much longer or at least much more noticeably than usual. Watching a crowd of people mill about is fascinating due this effect, as is watching the traffic go by. Another invariable visual effect is on the texture of fabrics, which will seem to shift around and to foam like a raging sea. This will happen not only on things like carpets, but on pebbly paths and cement sidewalks. Striped materials appear wavy and motile.

Something deeper than a simple visual effect leads to the reading in, or noticing of, more patterns, images, and structures in paintings and drawings, as well as in stories, ideas and concepts. Two-dimensional patterns or images may appear to have three-dimensional aspects, and these newly perceived (or pseudo-perceived) aspects will tend to change their structure. You may spend long periods of time (compared to the norm) staring at objects, often simple in nature (as normally seen), recognizing a new feature, a connection to other objects, a hidden beauty, or previously unrecognized feature.

Whether you are walking in the woods, looking out across the sea or a landscape, gazing at the sky or the stars, or even something less grand, you may find yourself overwhelmed by a feeling of tremendous awe, a recognition of beauty and wonder beyond anything you had ever dreamt possible. You may find yourself sinking to your knees wanting to express your worship or thanks, and you may cry in ecstasy. Some people have religious experiences in which they believe they contact ‘God’. This may happen if you have a religious upbringing or are used to interpreting knowledge about the world in a theistic framework. In my case, and those of the other atheist and agnostic trippers that I’ve talked to, this feeling of wonder is not felt as

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religious or spiritual (in any non-physical sense). I feel, more than ever while under the influence of LSD, that all reality is physical and understandable by the rational methods of empirical enquiry. ‘Awe’ is perhaps the best expression, since a ‘desire to give thanks or praise’ suggests the belief in a creator or sustainer of the universe. The awe that I have experienced is what has been described for centuries by mystics the world over. It is a feeling of understanding the universe in its entirety, of seeing all the connections, as feeling an integral part of a whole.

You may also believe that you have had some fundamental and undiscovered insight about the nature of reality. You may exclaim ‘This is it!’ and babble excitedly to your companion. Unfortunately you will find that a later reading of what you have written (or it may be taped) will prove disappointing, seeming much more silly and trivial or incomprehensible than important. I remember on my first powerful psychedelic voyage I discovered not one but two basic secrets of the universe; unfortunately they were mutually exclusive. I am now usually able to remember this fact when I trip, so I don’t take these ‘discoveries’ seriously. You will also generate more limited insights, and some of these will remain interesting even when you are thinking normally again. Psychedelic chemicals are excellent for coming up with new ideas or developments of previous thoughts. Though your idea-generator is working much more efficiently than in the straight condition, your critical faculties will be a fair bit lower (you can learn to partially compensate for this), so you will have to later sort through your new thoughts for the really good ones.

When you are in a calm, physically less active mode, you will find yourself becoming intensely reflective. You will think about things on a more philosophical level, you will see things in a different light, and you will find certain thoughts to be deeply fascinating and gripping. You will also start to think about yourself, your personality, and your memories of your earlier self much more than you would while normal. You will probably see yourself in a more objective light than usual, and you’ll experience a breaking down of barriers of self-deception and evasion or repression. It is this effect that can cause an emotionally traumatic reaction in persons who have repressed strong aspects of themselves, who avoid facing something about themselves that they don’t like, or who don’t really like themselves. That’s why I recommended caution or abstinence for such people. Of course you may not believe that you are such a person (this could be a side-effect of repressed thoughts). Those who suspect that they may have some of these unresolved problems may nevertheless want to use the chemical in the hope that they will gain some psychological benefits through its use, deciding that the benefits outweigh the risks. I think this is a reasonable choice for some people, but I would urge them to be sure to have at least one friend around and some kind of tranquilizer just in case the emotional disturbance becomes overwhelming. If you are already a very self-reflective person and are sure that you don’t have any major buried problems (recognized ones don’t seem to ever be a problem) then this will not be a worry for you. After 35 LSD trips I have never once had a problem of this kind. The nearest I came (which was not near at all) was a 15-minute period in which I experienced sadness, loneliness, and frustrated desire for a romantic

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partner, which caused me to cry. I felt this episode to be purging rather than disturbing.

A connected effect of LSD which can be very valuable is its tendency to make emotional openness, honesty, and expressiveness both to oneself and others more easy. You will be less inhibited in expressing your emotions and will be more interested in others’ feelings. This empathic effect is especially strong between who are tripping at the same time. It can deepen friendships and remove barriers, false fronts, and conventional constraints on affection and empathy. Reportedly, this is the major effect of MMDA (XTC), but I cannot as yet report on that from first-hand experience. You will also come to understand people different from yourselves and feel more well-disposed towards them. Your reactions to the behavior of others may be quite different. You will probably be more friendly and compassionate, more benevolent, and sometimes more paranoid. I have found that my temper disappears most of the time and I take hostility, unfriendliness, and other negative behaviors of others in a more philosophical and less personal manner.

There are some physical effects that you can expect. Most people feel some stiffness of some muscles (usually the jaw or neck or buttocks) which results from the tension apparently induced by the intensity of the experiences. This is a minor discomfort and can be reduced by periodic stretching and loosening exercises. Your hands may tremble a little, and you may feel that your whole body is vibrating with some strange energy. I feel this to be neutral or pleasant, and it tends to make me feel more alert. Your body heat will rise and your face will sweat more. Your thoughts will be faster and more intense and will contribute to your bodily feeling of increased energy and alertness. This effect means that you cannot expect to sleep if you take the chemical within 12 hours of your intended bed-time.

If your trip is a good one, as it is very likely to be if you’ve paid attention to the contents of this article, you will have a feeling of well-being, a belief that life is wonderful and that you are freer to achieve what you want than you had felt before. Laughter can come suddenly and without warning, though experience will make it more predictable. I’ve adopted a friend’s term for this - the ‘cosmic laughs’, since it fits the power of this hilarious condition. Laughter can be very strong, uncontrollable, and persistent. I haven’t had this too seriously (!) in public (it seems to be possible to head it off if you really want to) but have been unable to talk due to mirth in private. This is extremely enjoyable and quite therapeutic - you end up feeling a little weary temporarily, but cleansed and rejuvenated.

Some cognitive functions don’t function so efficiently while tripping. You may experience loss of a memory that you would normally have (this has only happened to me once), and you may lose track of conversations because your mind tends to shoot around, thinking of many things at once. You will never have any difficulty remembering what happened while under the influence of the drug however. An effect I’ve never experienced but apparently common is that you may be unable to speak for some time. I suspect this is due to the transition from thought to speech being rapidly and continuously broken up by the shift to new thoughts or ways of expressing them. I think the longest that I’ve seen this last is for about an

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hour, though most episodes are much shorter. There is no reason to find this distressing. If it happens, just relax and focus your attention on something other than talking.

Other people’s faces, and especially your own can alter, assuming amusing or frightening forms. I find this happens very little when I look at the faces of others, but is very common if I look in a mirror for any length of time. What happens depends on the dosage you take, on the expressions you actually form, and on the thoughts in your head. I dislike grimacing at myself as this tends to be unpleasant, but smiling usually makes me look like a clown! The mirror image may look like another dimension, giving you a feeling that you should be able to pass through into another world.

When around people that I find attractive I usually become even hornier than is usual for me. Those who I would usually find attractive become more so, and I find more appealing those who would normally be of minimal interest. It is widely reported that sex while heavily tripping can be incredibly intense and wonderful, and that orgasm can feel shatteringly and stunningly superb. If you can find a partner willing to do this with you while you are tripping you will probably want to try it.

Apart from alterations in the way some external things appear, you will find that with your eyes closed you see geometrical patterns, abstract shapes and, on high doses, incredible panoramas in brilliant colors. You can get a similar (though more static) effect by closing your eyes and standing in front of a strobe light - you’ll be surprised at the colors that appear despite the strobe being plain white.

In both perceptual and conceptual contexts you will find yourself discovering or inventing patterns in your experience. This reading in of significance can be helpful in the metaprogramming process since it supplies you with explanations that you would not normally think of relating to your own and others behavior. It’s necessary to apply critical faculties to these results since some of the new patterns will be genuine insights whereas others will be illusions or fantasies. The chemical seems to excite the neuronal network into a frenzy of structure building without the new mental structures necessarily representing reality accurately. The psychedelics are valuable as tools for boosting creativity and productivity of ideas and understanding, but this process needs to be supplemented by a process of rational examination of and selection from the results.

This explanation of some of the effects of LSD (probably the best metaprogramming chemical agent currently available) should make your first experiment less alien. I recommend reading a couple of books which include a wide range of descriptions before you engage in this project. You can get a list of books on the subject from your library; I recommend Sidney Cohen’s ‘Drugs of Hallucination’ in particular since it has a relatively balanced presentation. If you decide to embark on a chemical metaprogramming project, I would be glad to hear your results. I’m also interested in discussing specific techniques to be applied while ‘under the influence’. Any useful suggestions in this area will be incorporated in a future article.

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